Pocky Can Lead to the Unexpected
by claraowl
Summary: One day in Music Room Three, Haruhi sits on a couch and eats pocky. For some reason, the twins find this unbearable, and decide to teach their favorite toy a lesson. Hikaru x Haruhi x Kaoru (A.K.A. HikaHaru, KaoHaru, and HikaHaruKao) The story continues with Haruhi's second Dare... read to find out what occurs.
1. Never Take a Dare from Renge

**I apologize in advance for any OoC-ness you might find.**

**Quite obviously, I do not own OHSHC, even if I do have some pocky.**

Haruhi padded over to a couch in Music Room Three and sat down, chewing on the end of a stick of pocky. She held the box in her hand, her bag slung over one shoulder. Crunching the pocky carefully, she let her eyes glaze over, not focusing on anything in particular.

Hikaru, sitting on the couch across from her, looked up from the game he was helping Kaoru play (yes, Hikaru usually held the controller, but what's life without a bit of whimsy?) and met her eyes. He was somewhat startled that she was starting at him; it was unusual for her to spend more time than necessary watching any particular host. He smiled quickly at her and ducked his head, returning to the game. "Use Snorlax, Kaoru."

"Okay," Kaoru nodded, hitting the button. He glanced sideways at his twin and asked silently, _What's up?_

Hikaru flicked his eyes back to Haruhi, who was still staring relentlessly and eating her stick of pocky. _She's been staring at us for a few minutes._

Kaoru grinned as he glanced over and met Haruhi's eyes. He gave her a cheery wave. "Hello, Haruhi. Do you find us that interesting?"

Haruhi continued with her unblinking gaze, not responding to his call.

Kaoru shrugged to his twin, _Let's just leave her for now. The longer she stares, the more we can tease later._

_Sounds good to me, _Hikaru nodded.

Haruhi finished her stick of pocky as the twins returned to their game. Without bothering to look down at the box, she withdrew a second piece. Still unconsciously gazing at the twins, she began eating it, scraping the chocolate off of the stick with her teeth,

Kaoru glanced up from the game and blinked a few times in quick succession. He nudged his twin. _Hikaru, look at Haruhi._

Hikaru's eyes flicked over to Haruhi and he copied his twin, blinking. _Do you think… _he began.

…_that she's doing that on purpose?_ Kaoru finished. _Yes._

_Is she _trying _to torture us? _Hikaru sighed, watching Haruhi slowly pull the pocky stick in and out of her mouth, scraping the chocolate off of the outside as she went. He and his twin squirmed uncomfortably on the couch, watching Haruhi continue her administrations on the pocky stick. She soon finished scraping the chocolate off the biscuit cookie; after that, she slowly sucked on it, allowing it to dissolve in her mouth, never losing eye contact with the twins. Much to their displeasure, Hikaru and Kaoru were both on the verge of getting nosebleeds. The cleared their throats and returned to their game to feed Snorlax some spicy pokéblocks.

_Kaoru,_ Hikaru communicated, _is our toy toying with us?_

_I believe she is,_ Kaoru nodded, saving the game. _Shall we exact our revenge?_

Hikaru smirked. _We shall, but how?_

_Why don't we put on a show for the ladies?_ Kaoru motioned towards the large group of customers sitting with Kyoya, Tamaki, Mori, and Hunny.

_Do you have anything in particular in mind?_ Hikaru questioned silently as they stood up and walked over to Haruhi, who had finally dissolved her piece of pocky.

_Let's see what she does next,_ Kaoru suggested, smiling.

Haruhi, almost as if she had heard them, extracted two sticks of pocky from her box. Still gazing straight ahead, she put the ends of both in her mouth, walrus-tusk style. Light bulbs went on over the twins' heads.

_Kaoru, are you thinking what I'm thinking?_ Hikaru grinned.

_You bet I am,_ Kaoru nodded as the two descended upon their victim. Hikaru sat down on Haruhi's right; Kaoru, on her left. Both of them leaned forward and took an end of a pocky stick, biting gently on the end. Being careful not to break the stick, they began eating their way towards their favorite toy.

Haruhi remained impassive and, seemingly unknowingly, began chewing her way towards the twins, pulling the ends of the pocky sticks into her mouth. She stared forward, somehow succeeding in keeping herself from blinking.

Hikaru blushed as he noticed Haruhi working her way towards him. He wondered silently what was up with her; she was usually not one to participate in these types of things unless forced to do so. He grit his teeth, almost breaking the pocky in the process. He began working his way towards her more quickly, barely chewing before catching the next bit of pocky in his mouth.

Kaoru's cheeks were tinged with a lovely shade of fuchsia by this point, as Haruhi had been eating each of the pocky sticks equally. Their faces were now an inch apart; he could feel her breath on his face. He swallowed carefully and mentally prepared himself to eat the last bit of pocky. However, before he could do anything other than close his eyes, he felt something press against his mouth. His eyes snapped open and his fuchsia cheeks turned scarlet.

Haruhi had closed the distance between herself and the twins; both twins watched, red-faced, as her eyes finally slid shut. She could sense that neither twin had any idea what to do; this fact made the situation rather interesting. As she sat there, breathing through her nose due to the current occupation of her lips, she wondered what was supposed to come next. She decided to remain in that position until at least one of the twins regained their senses. She allowed her eyes to flutter open for a few seconds and was met with the dumbstruck faces of Hikaru and Kaoru.

Before either twin had enough time to gather their wits, Tamaki finally succeeded in escaping Renge, who had been holding him back. He dashed over to the couch where the three sat, still kissing. His screams, telling the twins to stop violating their sister's lips, were drowned out by the squeals of the watching ladies. The ladies squealed over the moe as Tamaki pried the still very shocked twins away from Haruhi. The twins stood where he let them go, gaping at Haruhi. Haruhi stood up calmly and walked back over to the group.

"Now that we're done there," she nodded, smiling, "truth or dare, Mori-sempai?"

The twins turned slowly towards the group, mouths open. They blinked a few times and silently resolved to get Haruhi back for this at a later date. "Hey, we want to play, too!" The dashed over to the group and dropped into chairs on either side of their favorite toy.

Renge grinned at her camera. She'd gotten fantastic pictures for her next doujinshi, along with a more exciting story line than she could have thought up herself, as she'd made over two hundred volumes by now, and was running out of ideas. Giggling to herself and winking at her fellow fangirls, she pulled her camera strap back around her neck to await whatever might come next in such an unpredictable game.

**Well, did you like it? Did you despise it with a burning passion? Do you want it to continue? Do you want it to die? Please drop your thoughts in that pretty little review box, even if it's just to say that you like pocky or pokemon****. :D**


	2. Belle of the Hitachiin Manor

**Claraowl: I don't own any of this! Also, many thanks to Mialiin and Hiding Behind a Closet [and others] for the Truth and Dare ideas!**

"Mori-sempai, Truth or Dare?" Haruhi repeated after the twins had claimed the seats on either side of her.

Mori seemed to consider for a moment before answering quietly, "Truth."

After considering for a moment, Haruhi asked, "If you were female for one day, what would you do?"

Mori blinked several times in quick succession before answering, "Find a cat and name it Maya." While everyone else was trying to understand his answer, he turned to Renge. "Renge, truth or dare?"

"Truth," Renge giggled enthusiastically, her camera at the ready for anything.

"Where did you get a motor with those capabilities?" Mori asked, possibly using up his word budget for the rest of the game.

Renge beamed. "I special-ordered it so that it could have teleportation capabilities and go through any floor. Isn't it great? Now I can appear dramatically at just the right moment, no matter where it is!"

The other fangirls grinned appreciatively at Renge's ability to come in on things at the right moment; after all, if she didn't, then where would all her lovely doujinshis be? They wouldn't exist, otherwise.

"Kyoya-sempai," Renge grinned, "Truth or Dare? Remember, you can't choose the same thing three times in a row!"

"With those rules, I must choose Dare," Kyoya replied coolly.

"Alright," Renge cast her eyes around the table, carefully considering her options. She grinned evilly and raised her camera. "I dare you to kiss Haruhi on the lips for thirty-five seconds in a row."

Kyoya showed absolutely no emotion as he stood up and walked over to Haruhi. Swallowing imperceptibly to anyone but himself and Haruhi, He leaned down and captured her lips. Instantly, Renge started snapping pictures; in the background, Mori restrained Tamaki from interrupting the dare. The whimpering of the latter was loud and exceptionally pathetic.

Thirty-five seconds and almost seventy pictures later, Kyoya withdrew and returned to his seat. "Truth or Dare, Tamaki?"

"DARE!" Tamaki yelled, finally being released from Mori's grasp.

"Fine," Kyoya smirked. "You kiss Haruhi, as you seem so upset when everyone else does so."

Tamaki, blushing, marched over to Haruhi and placed a quick peck on her lips. The twins, seated on either side of her, looped their arms over her shoulders as soon as they could get Tamaki to let go.

A few dares and a truth later, the game had circled back to Renge. She chose Hunny to be her victim once she had completed her dare of demonstrating her Medusa hair. "Truth or Dare, Hunny-sempai?"

"Truth," he smiled sweetly, flowers flying around him.

"Do you ever have fantasies about any member of the host club?"

"I imagined that Haruhi baked me a giant cake for my birthday," Hunny giggled, carefully omitting the parts of the daydream that would cause Renge to explode from moe.

Mori gave one of his slight smiles, being extremely thankful that he had not gotten that particular truth. He watched Haruhi with soft eyes.

The twins, noticing this, proceeded to pout for the rest of the game, until….

"Hikaru," a particularly loyal customer asked, "Truth or Dare?"

"Truth," both twins replied, bored and deciding to respond together.

"Why did you get so upset when Haruhi got kissed?"

After flushing, they replied in unison, "Haruhi's our toy, no one else's. Truth or Dare, Haruhi?"

"Dare," Haruhi sighed, having just done two truths.

The twins locked eyes over her head and nodded. They leaned down and whispered the dare into her ears. She sighed in resignation and nodded, "Yeah, yeah, I'll just need to let Dad know."

"Okay," they sang back. The session then came to an end, with much curiosity surrounding Haruhi's dare.

Haruhi did not reveal her dare, but sighed. She was going to have an interesting night, but at least it wasn't a weeknight.

~*Later That Day*~

"So what do you mean by inviting me over for a sleepover?" Haruhi asked, looking somewhat warily at the twins upon entering their mansion.

"Isn't it obvious?" Hikaru asked, wide-eyed with pretend innocence as he took one of her hands and began to lead her into another room.

"We wanted to play dress-up with our favorite doll!" Kaoru beamed, taking her other hand and shutting the door behind them. "Don't worry; we've got a changing area set up for you."

"You don't have to use it if you don't want to, though," Hikaru grinned.

"That's right," Kaoru added, pulling off a marvelous imitation of the Cheshire Cat. "If you want, you can change without the curtains. We don't mind."

Haruhi sighed, resigned to the fact that she would have to dress up in whatever outfits the twins threw at her. "I'll use the curtains, thanks."

"So you will play dress-up with us!" Hikaru exclaimed, walking her over to a closet as large as Haruhi's apartment.

Haruhi, noticing this fact, muttered her utterly classic line, "Damn rich bastards…."

Kaoru snickered, "It's been a while since you've said that, Haruhi."

"Actually, it hasn't been all that long," Haruhi replied. "You just haven't been listening."

In response to this remark, the twins - after, of course, they realized how utterly pointless it was to argue with Haruhi - made a Haruhi sandwich and apologized in an excessively sappy manner. (This apology shall not be included in this recording in order to prevent more sensitive readers from crying, squealing, or vomiting.) They then released her and pulled out the first outfit they had planned for her.

"No way," Haruhi said flatly. "That covers less than the bathing suit you guys wanted me to wear."

"But Haruhi," Hikaru whined, "I thought you were going to play dress-up with us!"

"I said I'd play dress-up, not strip-off," Haruhi replied, glaring at the offending lace scraps.

"Fine," Kaoru smiled. "How about something that covers a bit more skin than your school uniform, then?"

"I suppose so, if I have to," Haruhi sighed. "I refuse to wear anything transparent, though."

After a brief pouting session performed expertly by the little devil types, Haruhi was presented with an outfit, complete with accessories. She exhaled at the twins' antics before stepping behind the curtains of the changing area to disrobe.

Hikaru and Kaoru wore their Cheshire Cat grins as they quickly changed outfits so as to match what they were forcing Haruhi to wear. After smoothing everything into place, they called, "Are you ready in there, Haruhi?"

"Almost," she called back. As they walked closer to the curtains, they heard her hiss, "How am I supposed to do up the back of this thing?"

"Want some help?" they chorused, poking their heads around the curtain to see a mostly-dressed Haruhi.

"Sure," she replied, as calmly as she possibly could in such a situation. "I just can't get all of the back done up properly."

"Allow us," they beamed, faces slightly fuchsia at the sight of her exposed upper back and the thin strip of cotton that crossed it.

"Yeah, yeah," Haruhi muttered, aware of the placement of their gazes.

Two minutes and an awful lot of tugging upon strings later, the twins announced that they were finished. "Get you accessories on and come out," Kaoru ordered.

"Whatever," Haruhi shrugged, putting on her elbow-length gloves and the Russian portrait bracelet that the hosts had given her. Once she had clipped the rest of her jewelry into place, pulled on her shoes, and run a brush through her short hair - as per the twins' instructions - she stepped out from behind the curtains. She was met by the soft, wet, popping sound of two mouths dropping simultaneously.

After they had re-hinged their jaws, Hikaru and Kaoru bowed deeply to Haruhi, each of them taking one of her hands and pressing their lips to it as they did so. "Welcome, princess. You make a lovely Belle."

Haruhi, clad in a golden, Disney-style dress, sighed with a slight smile. Trust the twins to know her favorite Disney movie. "Are you being the Beast, or are you Gaston?"

"The Beast, of course," Hikaru grinned.

"After Belle tells him that she loves him," Kaoru added, smiling mischievously.

"Naturally," Haruhi smiled, deciding that she might as well play along, "when else would it be? You're not in giant, hideous monster form."

"We may not be hideous," Hikaru grinned, placing his left arm around her waist and taking her right hand in his own, "but how do you know how big we are?"

"You really shouldn't say such things without having solid evidence, you know," Kaoru smirked, mirroring his brother's movements. "Would you like to check your statement, to see whether or not it's true?"

"No," Haruhi stated flatly, her cheeks only slightly pink.

"Aww, why not?" Hikaru asked as he and his twin led her through a set of rather large double doors.

"Don't you like us?" Kaoru whimpered.

"Of course I do," Haruhi replied bluntly, "I just don't need to know information like that."

"You may not _need_ to know…" Hikaru began.

"…but do you _want_ to know?" Kaoru completed, playing the role of a princely Cheshire Cat.

"Not particularly," Haruhi replied, casting her gaze around the capacious ballroom they had entered moments earlier. "May I ask what you're planning to do?"

"Haruhi, do you remember…" Hikaru began, grinning over her head at his twin.

"…the last scene with Belle and the Beast in the Disney movie?" Kaoru completed, winking at his twin.

"With the dancing? Of cour -" Haruhi quickly cut herself off, realizing the twins' evil plot. "No. I refuse."

"But Haruhi," the twins whined, "you promised that you'd play with us today." The little devil types pouted, pulling excessively cute kitty eyes in the process. Since even Haruhi would give in when the Hitachiin brother kitty eyes were on either side of her, they knew that they had won when she bit her lip and sighed.

"Fine," she huffed, glaring at them, "but just one dance. That's all it shows in the movie, anyway."

Tucking away the fact that Haruhi had seen the movie before for later, the twins beamed, "Together or separately?"

"Separately, I suppose," she muttered, thinking that the twins would be less likely to tear her in two if the dances were done separately.

Ah, how wrong she was….

"I want to dance with Haruhi first!" Hikaru shouted excitedly, releasing her waist in order to better grab her arm.

"No, I do!" Kaoru yelled, also releasing her waist, and grabbing her other arm.

"Me!"

"Me!"

"Me!"

"Me!"

"ME!"

"ME!"

"ME!"

"ME!"

"Shut up!" Haruhi screamed, finally losing her cool and slapping tape (which had, for whatever reason, been conveniently tucked into her elbow-high gloves) over their mouths. "If you can't decide on your own who's dancing first, use Rock-Dagger-Book-Wizard-Owl!"

Her outburst was followed by a moment of stunned silence; the twins were not sure if they had ever heard Haruhi say anything so loudly before. Staring at her as they removed the tape from their mouths, they decided that they had taken things too far and that they should do things her way. Fingering the slightly tender skin around their mouths, they asked, "What's Rock-Dagger-Book-Wizard-Owl?"

Slightly calmer now that they had ceased their petty arguing, Haruhi replied, "It's a version of Rock-Paper-Scissors that a friend and I made up in junior high."

"With Arai?" Kaoru asked, as Hikaru was currently unable to speak, due to the fact that he had buried his nose in Haruhi's hair moments before.

"No, it was my friend Kasumi," Haruhi answered, not even bothering to ask why Hikaru was smelling her head. "I ran into her a couple weeks ago," she added, lifting her eyes to a point slightly above Kaoru's head, "I should give her a call again sometime soon, so that we can get the girls together again."

"So, how do you play - what was it again?" Hikaru asked, surfacing from Haruhi's hair looking slightly dazed. He had not heard a word that Haruhi had said.

Haruhi turned to face him; Kaoru buried his nose in her hair. Haruhi closed her eyes for a moment before asking Hikaru, "Should I just wait until Kaoru stops smelling me to explain?"

"That'd probably be a good idea," Hikaru grinned. "You have an intoxicating scent - did you know that?"

Haruhi simply gave him her famous half-oval stare and sighed.

Several exceptionally long moments and one particularly irritated Haruhi later, Kaoru surfaced from her hair. "Are you quite done?"

"For now," the troublemakers grinned, "yes."

"It's relatively simple once you get used to it," Haruhi nodded, preparing herself to explain. "The Dagger is the sword in the stone, so it beats Rock. The Book it read by the Wizard and delivered by the Owl. Owl wields Dagger; Dagger stabs Wizard. Wizard transfigures Rock; stupid human throws Rock at Owl. Book studies Rock. The pen is mightier than the sword. Wizard and Owl enter into a debate with no clear winner."

The twins stared blankly at Haruhi, their mouths gaping. "C-Come again?"

Haruhi sighed, took a deep breath, and repeated herself.

After a rather decent round of twin blinks, Hikaru asked, "When exactly did you play last?"

"When I ran into Kasumi," Haruhi replied. "Weren't you listening? I mentioned her a couple of minutes ago."

"No, apparently," Kaoru grinned. "But why did you randomly play a game over lunch?"

"Oh, it was to decide who had to pay the tip," Haruhi grinned. "I won, so she had to pay."

Hikaru stared at Haruhi for a few moments before tearing away his gaze and glancing at his twin. To his great surprise, Kaoru was blushing slightly, his eyes fixed on the bodice of Haruhi's dress; a slight gurgle was emitting from his throat. Before the older twin could wonder about his younger brother, however, Haruhi clapped her hands in front of Kaoru's face. He started violently and stared wildly around.

"Are you ready to start now?" Haruhi asked, sounding slightly bored.

"S-Start what?" Kaoru stuttered, still slightly dazed.

"Rock-Dagger-Book-Wizard-Owl," Haruhi replied, sounding slightly irritated.

"How do you make the symbols?" Hikaru asked, slipping an arm around her waist and slinging his other arm around Kaoru's shoulders.

"Rock," Haruhi said, making a fist. "Dagger," she extended her first two fingers and made a jabbing motion. "Book," she put her hands flat against each other and opened them, palms up and sides together. "Wizard," she pointed her first finger and waved her hand around. "Owl," she flapped her hands like wings. "Ready?" she asked. "One, two, three, go!"

Hikaru flapped his hands.

Kaoru flapped his hands.

Haruhi put her head in her hands and wondered why she had not seen this coming. "Try it again."

Kaoru made the wizard symbol.

Hikaru made the wizard symbol.

Haruhi made an irritated symbol, pushing her palm against her forehead.

Hikaru made a book.

Kaoru made a book.

Haruhi found and began to read a book.

_Several exceptionally long minutes later…._

Kaoru made a stabbing motion with his fingers.

Hikaru made a stabbing motion with his fingers.

Haruhi made a time-out motion with her fingers.

"Yes, Haruhi?" the twins chorused.

"This is ridiculous," she sighed, rolling her eyes. "Hikaru, start the music. Kaoru, let's dance. You guys can cut in and out whenever."

The twins smirked at each other, celebrating the arrival of a somewhat-active Haruhi. Hikaru, grinning, dashed off to start the music. Kaoru, beaming, dipped a deep bow and extended his hand to Haruhi. She swept him an exceptionally clumsy curtsy. Kaoru snickered as she took his outstretched hand and the dance began. His laughter quickly turned to winces as she repeatedly trod upon his feet in their waltz.

Hikaru chose this moment to cut in, so as to save his younger brother's feet - not to mention getting to dance with his favorite toy. He tapped Kaoru on the shoulder and then bowed to Haruhi. Kaoru twirled Haruhi once and passed her off to his older brother. Haruhi swept another supremely clumsy curtsy and took Hikaru's hand, wondering if there was such a thing as "twin-hopping" - if so, she appeared to be doing it.

After several back-and-forths, the song came to an end. Haruhi, feeling strangely exhausted, attempted to walk off of the dance floor. The twins, however, had different ideas.

"Where are you going, Haruhi?" Hikaru whimpered, pulling adorable kitty eyes.

"I'm tired and I want to get out of this ridiculous dress," Haruhi replied, sighing.

"But you said you'd dance two dances!" Kaoru exclaimed, also using kitty eyes.

"That was only because you two couldn't decide who was going to dance first," Haruhi reminded them.

"Yes, but neither of us got a full dance!" the twins protested in unison. "We each only got half a dance!"

"Urgh, fine," Haruhi groaned. "But I get to change out of this outfit after this dance."

"But, Haruhi," the twins grinned, "we haven't had our royal feast yet! We're having fancy tuna!"

"Can't we eat in regular clothes?" Haruhi asked, already knowing the answer, but having a desperate hope to the contrary.

Unfortunately for her, Hikaru's answer was exactly the one she had been dreading. "Of course not!" He proclaimed, looking offended, "It wouldn't be a royal feast if we weren't dressed like royalty!"

"But do I really have to keep this thing on?" Haruhi asked, deciding not to point out that a royal feast was made royal by lineage, not by dress.

"No…" Kaoru said slowly, and grinning evilly, "I suppose not."

"Ah, yes," Hikaru grinned, cottoning on, "you don't have to stay in that dress - after this next dance, of course."

"Okay, then," Haruhi agreed, not quite grasping the full danger that was to come, "let's dance. Hikaru, you're first this time; Kaoru, would you please go start the music?"

The second song was slower, softer, and more sensual. Haruhi blinked. "This isn't a waltz."

"No it isn't, Captain Obvious," Hikaru grinned, placing his hands gently on her back and waist, pulling her close to him. Haruhi stared up at him. "What's wrong, Haruhi?" Hikaru asked.

"Where am I supposed to put my hands?" Haruhi questioned, blinking up at him in confusion, unconsciously sending his heart through a series of jumping jacks.

Hikaru, cheeks burning, took Haruhi's hands in his own and placed them gently on his shoulders. He then returned his hands to their previous positions and cautiously guided her through the movements of the dance, his cheeks a lovely shade of vermillion all the while. About a quarter of the way through the dance, Haruhi rested her head on his chest, looped her arms around his neck, and closed her eyes comfortably. Hikaru's heart almost stopped as it beat into her ear and threatened to jump out of his throat.

Kaoru watched with a slight amount of envy until the song reached its midway point. He chose that moment to cut in; he walked up to his brother and tapped him on the shoulder, before sweeping a low bow to Haruhi. Hikaru pressed his lips to Haruhi's cheek before passing her off to his younger brother. Kaoru pulled Haruhi close, relishing the way she looped her arms around his neck and rested her head on his chest. Her ear was over his rapidly beating heart, causing some small portion of her brain to wonder if she was going to be deaf before the morning came. As his heart rate slowed to a more ordinary speed, it became her melody. A few seconds before the end of the song, her eyes fluttered shut and her breathing grew steady. The two continued to sway as she slipped into dreamland.

A few moments later, Kaoru realized that Haruhi had fallen asleep against him; he and her hoop skirt were al that allowed her to remain standing. He gulped and caught Hikaru's eye.

_What's up?_ Hikaru mouthed.

_The ceiling,_ Kaoru replied, _but that's not important right now. Haruhi fell asleep on me, and I can't move without her falling. What should we do?_

Hikaru stared blankly at the scene before him. _I have no idea… maybe we should wake her up?_

_Sure,_ Kaoru replied, _but how?_

Hikaru walked over and poked Haruhi's cheek. "Haruhi," he sang, "it's time to wake up! Wakey, wakey, artichakey!"

"Nnn…" Haruhi mumbled, "Hikaru, stop it…"

Kaoru, intrigued, licked her cheek.

"…Kaoru, stop it…"

The twins exchanged a grin; it was experiment time.

Kaoru gently bit her exposed ear.

"…I said quit it, Kaoru…"

Hikaru licked her cheek.

"…enough, Hikaru…"

"Wow," Hikaru grinned, "she's amazing."

"Yeah… even when she's asleep, she can tell us apart," Kaoru smiled, his eyes soft.

Haruhi's eyes fluttered open; she yawned, "Did the song end?"

"Were you so caught up in our dance that you didn't notice?" Kaoru teased.

"No fair!" Hikaru pouted. "You didn't go off into la-la-land when we were dancing! Do you like him more than me?"

Haruhi wisely chose to ignore this question and, talking over his further protests, began waking towards the door. The twins quickly fell into step on either side of her, sporting their Cheshire Cat grins. Haruhi, sensing trouble, slowed her steps. "What now?"

"Are you ready to get changed, Ha-ru-hi?" Hikaru asked, looping an arm over her shoulder.

"Yes," Haruhi replied cautiously.

"Great," Kaoru grinned, dashing off ahead of his brother and toy. "I'll go prepare the changing room."

"What does he mean, 'prepare'?" Haruhi asked Hikaru, who still had an arm over her shoulders.

"He's just getting it all nice and organized for you, that's all," Hikaru smiled innocently.

"It was organized when I left it - I even folded my clothes," Haruhi stated flatly. "What are you planning?"

"You can't really blame us, you know," Hikaru grinned. "After all, you were the one who agreed to play dress-up with us."

"Fine, whatever," Haruhi sighed, realizing that resistance was futile.

Hikaru grinned and sent a thumbs-up signal to his twins as he steered Haruhi back into the room with the changing area. Kaoru nodded, eyes gleaming. Haruhi sighed, slumping over - or, at least, slumping over as much as is possible in a hoop skirt.

"Alright, Haruhi - time to change!" Hikaru beamed, shoving her into the changing booth.

"Oh, wait - do you need help with the back?" Kaoru asked.

Haruhi said nothing, but nodded and turned her back. "Thanks, Kaoru," she smiled slightly as he slowly undid the ribbons on the back of her dress.

Kaoru grinned, "You won't be thanking me when you see the next outfit. Have fun!" He retreated, snickering, to the outside of the curtain. He grabbed his next costume and changed quickly, exchanging evil grins with his brother, who was already in outfit.

Haruhi groaned aloud when she saw the next outfit. "Those damn rich bastards…."

**Claraowl: Dun-dun-dun~! If you guess the next set of outfits, you get a hug from Bereznoff, Nekozawa-sempai, and me! **

**Please review and let me know if you liked it~! XD**


	3. Japanese Dinner for an Arabian Princess

**I deeply apologize for any OoC-ness you might see. *bows* Gomen'nasai! **

**A thank-you goes to Ebru Raveniz Gunduz Lestrange for suggesting which particular outfit the twins force Haruhi into this time! (To tell the truth, I'd forgotten that this princess had that outfit.) :D**

**Obviously, I do not own OHSHC… please enjoy anyway! **

"They cannot be serious," Haruhi muttered as she observed her next outfit.

"Oh, but we are," the twins chimed from the other side of the curtains.

_Do they have a list of my favorite Disney movies or something?_ Haruhi thought, managing to extract herself from the hoopskirt of her previous dress. _First _Beauty and the Beast_, now this - what else are they going to pull?_

"Are you ready yet, Ha-ru-hi?" the twins chorused, already fully costumed.

"I'm still getting out of the first dress," Haruhi called back.

Hikaru sighed, "I guess we made it too complicated in design, Kaoru."

"She did look exactly like Belle, though," Kaoru smiled.

"Did you get the pictures?" whispered the older twin.

His younger doppelganger snickered, "But of course - milord shall go utterly insane when he sees them.

"Tamaki-sempai will go utterly insane when he sees what?" Haruhi asked, emerging from the changing area, clad in her next outfit. After a jaw drop somewhat similar to last chapter - though it was slightly more exaggerated - the twins extended their hands towards Haruhi. "Are you ready for the feast, Princess Jasmine?"

"Sure, Aladdin," Haruhi sighed, laughing slightly at their reactions, "but wouldn't it have been better if one of you had been Abu, instead of you both being Aladdin?"

"That's the trouble - we both wanted to be Abu, but we couldn't decide who got the honor," Kaoru explained.

"The same thing happened with the Genie," Hikaru pouted.

"So you're both Aladdin…" Haruhi sighed, "from his 'Prince Ali' era."

"Yup!" the twins cheered.

"Actually," Haruhi added, surveying the twins before turning to look at her outfit in one of the many mirrors, "I'm surprised that neither of you are Jafar."

"Why would we be Jafar?" Kaoru asked.

Hikaru agreed, "There would be no point to it. He winds up trapped in a lamp anyway."

"Hey, Hikaru," Kaoru smirked, "maybe Haruhi's saying that she wants us to serve her - you know, grant her wishes like a genie."

Hikaru's mind whirred into action; he blushed. "You're such a naughty girl, Haruhi - but I didn't think you'd like them submissive."

"What are you talking about?" Haruhi asked, glancing down at her rather skimpy outfit. "I thought you put me in the red outfit from Jafar's reign of terror so that I'd have to feed you grapes and act servile - you know, like how Jasmine had to in the movie." "S-so you want to serve us?" Hikaru stuttered, gulping loudly.

"No," Haruhi stated flatly. She raised her eyebrows slightly and hid a smirk as an idea crossed her mind. "Do you want to know what I _do_ want to do?"

Hikaru and Kaoru nodded excitedly.

"Do you really want to know?" Haruhi asked, dragging out their anticipation for the sheer enjoyment of annoying them. Had the twins not been so interested in discovering what she wanted to do, they would have been immensely pleased at how terribly they had corrupted her.

"Yes!" the twins exclaimed excitedly.

"Well, I -" she paused. "Are you sure you really want to know?"

"Stop playing with us!" Hikaru yelled, losing his patience.

Kaoru, casually clamping a hand over his twin's mouth, smiled at her. "We'd really like to know what you want to do, so please tell us, Haruhi." He shot her his kitty eyes - the look so powerful that it could even top Tamaki's puppy eyes.

Haruhi, being only human, gave in to his request. "Alright," she sighed, "I'll tell you. What I really want to do is -" This time, her stomach cut off her words by way of emitting a large growl.

Hikaru was too busy being shocked to notice that his twin had released him. He gulped, dumbfounded, at Haruhi; he had been expecting that she would say something more… unlike herself. He shook his head, realizing how ridiculous he was being. After all, who could Haruhi be, if not herself?

Kaoru snickered at Haruhi's cheeks, which had dusted themselves lightly with pink. Releasing his brother, he walked towards her and extended his arm to her. "Shall we go to the banquet hall and get you some dinner, Princess Jasmine?"

Haruhi smiled with slight amusement as she took his arm. "I suppose we shall, Prince Ali… or should I say, Aladdin?"

"Call me whatever you like," Kaoru winked as they waited by the door for Hikaru to cease his astonishment, "but make sure that I'm the only one you call." He half-whispered the latter half of the sentence, sending his words dancing across her skin.

Haruhi gave a small shiver; she had not heard his exact words, but their general meaning was unmistakable, even to someone as dense as our favorite tanuki.

"What's wrong, Haruhi?" Kaoru asked as Hikaru, still halfway across the room, finally snapped back to his senses. "Are you cold?" _Did she shiver because of me? _he wondered as shifted his arm, causing her fingertips to slip off of his sleeve. He then wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her close.

"A little," Haruhi replied, wondering why his words had caused her to shiver, "but I'll probably feel better after dinner."

"To the banquet, then!" Kaoru proclaimed, guiding her into the next room and gesturing dramatically with his free arm.

Hikaru, having caught up with them, slipped his arm through his brother's and around to the other side of Haruhi's waist.

Haruhi decided to heck with it all and, upon settling into this mindset, wrapped an arm around each of their shoulders. This led to two very surprised twins pulling her closer; the three of them entered the dining hall this way, and remained in this position until they reached a table with three chairs in a row. Haruhi let out a rather audible gasp and dropped her arms when she saw what awaited her. "Is that - ?"

"Ootoro for Haruhi!" the twins grinned, releasing her. "Eat up!"

Haruhi, not needing to be told twice, plopped herself down in the center seat of the three and picked up a piece of tuna.

Hikaru and Kaoru claimed the seats on either side of Haruhi and stared at her, resting the sides of their faces on their hands - right and left, respectively. They grinned widely as she opened her mouth and popped the piece of fish inside.

Haruhi's eyes sparkled as she slowly chewed her long-sought-after treat. The taste permeated every corner of her mouth; she moaned slightly as she moved the fish back and forth in her mouth. Her eyelids fluttered shut as she leaned her head against the back of her chair and sighed happily.

Hikaru fidgeted in his seat.

Kaoru blushed violently.

Both of them grinned widely.

"Do you _like_ that, Haruhi?" they whispered, light bulbs going off over their heads.

"Yes," Haruhi sighed as she opened her eyes. "That was great, thank you." She reached for a second piece, only to discover that the plate had vanished. She blinked a few times before casting a suspicious glance first at Hikaru, and then at Kaoru.

"Yes, Haruhi?" Kaoru asked, false sweetness laced through his voice.

"Whatever is the matter?" Hikaru inquired, poorly masking his smirk.

"What did you guys do with the rest of the tuna?" she asked, internally pouting; she was glad that she had gotten to try the tuna, but it had such an exquisite taste that she wanted another piece.

"What, indeed…" Hikaru beamed.

Haruhi turned to look at him.

Behind her, Kaoru gave his twin a thumbs-up signal.

"Is that a piece over there?" Hikaru asked, pointed at Kaoru; while Haruhi was turning to face Kaoru, the plate changed hands behind her chair.

"Say 'ahhh'!" Kaoru grinned, holding out a piece for Haruhi. She shrugged slightly and allowed him to feed her. Kaoru enjoyed this, mainly due to the fact that he could see all of Haruhi's tuna-bliss expression. He felt himself blush.

When her eyes fluttered open, she smiled at him. "Thank you, Kaoru. That was delicious."

Kaoru gulped slightly, more than aware of the effect she was having on him. His hand shaking only slightly, he pressed a second piece of tuna into her hand. "Your turn."

Haruhi laughed slightly as she gave in to her fate. "If I must."

"You must," Kaoru nodded, before opening his mouth. A moment later, Haruhi had placed the tuna on his tongue, only to pull it out before he could close his mouth. He blinked at her when, after a long and fierce battle, he captured the piece of tuna. When she turned around to do the same for Hikaru - as she had figured out their pattern of tuna-consuming to be herself, Kaoru, Hikaru, and repeat - Kaoru asked her, "Who are you and what have you done with our Haruhi?"

Haruhi merely shrugged, as she was currently entangled in a game of get-the-tuna.

This cycle of tuna-chasing continued for the three of them - the twins, of course, having decided to play Haruhi's game with her - until the plate was empty. Haruhi leaned her head against the back of her chair and smiled contentedly. Before the host club had crashed rather unceremoniously into her life, she would never had considered a game like this to be fun. Now, however, she not only considered it amusing - she had even started it. She laughed slightly, which caused Hikaru to ask at what she was laughing.

"Oh, nothing," she snickered, "I was just thinking about how splendidly you two have corrupted me."

"Why, thank you," the twins grinned in unison, leaning close to her and bearing identical smirks. "We pride ourselves on your corruption."

After rolling her eyes at them, Haruhi leaned her head back against her chair and allowed herself to sink into her thoughts.

Hikaru and Kaoru took advantage of this opportunity to stare at Haruhi in her rather skimpy costume, their eyes roving everywhere that they shouldn't be. Needless to say, they were rather startled when Haruhi gave a small exclamation.

"W-what?" Kaoru asked, gulping.

"What is it?" Hikaru added, flushing.

"Oh," Haruhi said, startling out of her reverie, "I just realized that while bananas would gain world domination more quickly than pineapples, pineapples would be able to stay in control longer."

The twins blinked at her in surprise and confusion.

Haruhi elaborated, "Bananas, due to their association with comedy, could take over more quickly due to how unexpected their coup d'état would be; however, they wouldn't be able to hold onto their power because, frankly, bananas can't do much without coconut minions. Therefore, if the pineapples decided to take over, all they'd have to do was get the coconuts to come over to their side, as the pineapples themselves are already tough and spiny. While bananas are good initially, they lose to pineapples once the idiotic coconuts switch sides."

"Is that so?" Kaoru asked weakly. He and Hikaru looked at each other, and then gaped at Haruhi; they did not know what they had been expecting, but most certainly had not been that. It appeared that they did not know Haruhi as well as they had thought.

"Yes, it is so," Haruhi nodded. "All bananas can do once the kamikaze coconuts leave is make people slip or laugh themselves into paralysis. By the time they get one leader done, another leader has recovered from laughing and eaten the head banana."

"Okay, then," Hikaru replied in a somewhat strangled voice. He locked eyes with his twin and they decided silently upon their next course of action. Nodding, the Hitachiin brothers stood up and they each offered Haruhi a hand. She stood up, took both of them, and smiled.

The twins led her into another room; this room had several elaborate fireplaces and many large, comfortable seats with reading lamps behind them. Hikaru and Kaoru gently steered Haruhi into a crimson chair and turned on the reading lamp above her head. Operation: Interrogate Haruhi was about to begin.

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! ^^ Please review, and feel free to drop any questions for Haruhi, the twins, or myself in the review box!**

**If you want a hug and you review, let me know and I shall give you one~!**

**If you don't want a hug… please review anyway! :D I greatly appreciate reviews~!**


	4. Operation: Interrogate Haruhi

**Greetings, readers! ^^ I'm happy to see all of you again! I believe that we left off with Operation: Interrogate Haruhi about to begin. Before that, I'd like to ask all of you what you think of the story thus far and to thank those of you who did leave me your thoughts. :D I appreciate your feedback! **

**I apologize for my lateness.**

**Okay, I'll stop blathering now and get on with the story… I do not own any of the characters, the setting, or things associated with OHSHC. Please enjoy~!**

"Do I even want to know what's about to happen?" Haruhi asked, glancing with slight suspicion at Hikaru and Kaoru from her rather comfortable chair. The light from the reading - rather, interrogation - lamp shone down upon her, causing her to squint.

Hikaru grinned widely.

Kaoru snickered.

"I'll take that as a 'no.'" Haruhi sighed, hugging her legs to her chest and sinking back into the chair.

"Haruhi," Hikaru began, a slightly alarming sweetness in his voice, "Kaoru and I were just thinking that we know very little about you."

"Therefore," Kaoru smiled, false innocence laced through his voice, "we were wondering if you'd answer a few of our questions."

"Define 'a few,' and I'll consider it," Haruhi stated, becoming more aware of the dangerous waters in which she swam.

"Oh, no more than two dozen," Hikaru beamed, showing his molars.

"Give or take four dozen," Kaoru added.

"I will answer no more than twenty," Haruhi stated flatly, allowing no room for argument; of course, she would much rather not answer any at all, but she realized that this was impossible in the Hitachiin household.

"Twenty questions it is!" Hikaru and Kaoru cheered; they were greatly pleased with this number, as they had been expecting her to flatly refuse.

"But," Haruhi hastily added, "I get to choose not to answer three of them."

"One," Hikaru countered.

"Three," Haruhi repeated.

"One," Hikaru replied.

"Two," Haruhi relented, "but I get to ask each of you three questions."

"Okay," the twins shrugged, unaware of the danger of the Haruhi they had corrupted.

"You may begin," Haruhi nodded, keeping her smirk in check - after all, she didn't want them getting suspicious.

"Question one!" Hikaru beamed, "Which host do you dream about most frequently, and how often is that?"

Skating over the fact that this was a combination of two questions, Haruhi replied, "I dream about all of you pretty equally. You all turn up maybe once a week, and then appear separately or in small groups one or two other nights. For some odd reason, though, you two never show up in a pair. I've never been able to figure out why that is."

Hikaru and Kaoru blinked at each other. They had not been expecting her to have dreamed about them any more than they had expected her to talk about fruit taking over the world. In fact, they had assumed that Haruhi was the type of person who didn't remember their dreams.

"Okay… on to question two," Kaoru nodded. "What do we usually do in those dreams?"

To their great surprise, a light blush dusted Haruhi's cheeks. Despite this, she remained calm. "You guys don't really do anything out of the ordinary, I suppose… it's usually just more of what you do to me during the day."

"Question three," Hikaru gulped, "do you like these dreams?"

"I suppose," Haruhi shrugged, causing both Hitachiins to flush deeply. "After all, I still like all of you well enough."

"I-is there anything unusual about these dreams?" Kaoru asked, using their fourth question and a stutter.

Haruhi thought for a moment before answering. "Well," she blinked, trying to remember, "Aside from you two almost never being together, obviously, there's the fact that Mori-sempai always wears a… hat and whispers a lot more than usual… and that Kyoya's eyes get exceptionally dark when he… when he's in the dreams."

Hikaru and Kaoru looked at each other and blinked, processing the information she had given them in her words and actions; her rewording her sentence had not escaped their notice.

"What exactly - _exactly_ - did Kyoya-sempai do in the exceptionally dark-eyed dreams?" Hikaru asked, using their fifth question.

Haruhi blinked up at them, wondering simultaneously why they were wasting a question and how she could answer without it being incriminating. "Well, to be honest," she looked up at the two of them, their eyes boring into hers, "I suppose that he acts kind of like you two, only more so."

"What do you mean, 'more so'?" Hikaru asked, without giving a second thought to the fact that he was using their sixth question.

Haruhi blushed lightly. "He just gets closer to me that usual, and he touches me more… but he maintains his shadow lord aura throughout the dream. He's somewhat powerful, I'd guess you'd say." She gave an almost imperceptible gulp.

"Changing topics," Kaoru interjected, clamping a hand over Hikaru's mouth, "for your seventh question: We know who your first kiss ever was - but have you ever kissed a guy?"

Haruhi shrugged. "Not that I remember, but if you go by Mori-sempai's reaction to the whole fiasco on April Fool's Day, I think I kissed him. If you're really curious, I think you should ask him."

Hikaru quickly texted Mori and asked him; his cheeks grew red and his expression became one of frustration when the answer returned as an affirmative.

"Haruhi," Kaoru asked, while Hikaru was attempting to calm down, "you've kissed all the members of the host club at least once, right?"

"No," Haruhi answered the eighth question, after a moment of thought. "I haven't kissed Honey-sempai - or Renge, if you count her as a member."

Kaoru nodded, noting mentally that he had been present for all but one of said kisses - after all, most of the kisses had happened earlier that day. He sat down on the arm of her chair, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "While my brother is freaking out, I'm going to use our ninth question. What is one thing that really turns you on?"

Haruhi blinked at Kaoru, her cheeks darkening to a lovely shade of cerise. "Really dark chocolate, I suppose," she whispered.

"Dark chocolate," Kaoru grinned thoughtfully.

Haruhi nodded, feeling slightly wary and rather glad that she had not told him anything more unusual.

After recovering, clearing his throat, and sitting down on the other arm of her chair, Hikaru slung his arm over Haruhi's shoulders. "So, Haruhi," he smirked, "if you had the two of us as your servants for a day, what would you have us do?"

Haruhi's face worked furiously for a moment before she managed to hide her smirk. "You two as my servants for a day," Haruhi considered her options carefully, her eyes flickering back and forth between their faces. "Well, for starters, I'd probably make the two of you clean my apartment - correctly, mind you. After that, I'd have you make some breakfast for my father and me, and then clean up whatever huge mess you'd make. Then, I'd have you two do the laundry - even if I had to talk you, spoiled as you are, through it. Then -"

"Haruhi, skip the basics and skip to the good stuff!" Hikaru sighed.

"Yeah, we know that whoever was your servant for the day would have to do the chores," Kaoru agreed. "We just wanted to know what else you'd have us do."

Haruhi blinked at them. "What do you mean? Chores can take up almost an entire day. There wouldn't be time for much else."

"But there would be some time left," Hikaru pressed.

"Do tell us, Haruhi," Kaoru grinned.

Haruhi considered the two of them for a moment, her eyes flickering back and forth, forth and back between them. "I don't know," she said slowly, flicking through the many pages of options in her mind, "maybe I'd have you tell me about your past, or I'd have you be completely silent for a few minutes - you know, just to see how that would be - or I could even have you go to work with Dad." She laughed internally at this last one upon seeing their somewhat horrified expressions.

"Eleventh question," Kaoru said hurriedly. "When you were in middle school, did you ever hang out with a group of friends - if so, tell us about them, will you?"

"I'm not sure if you'd call it a group, but some of us did get together sometimes," Haruhi shrugged. "People floated in and out, depending on their schedule - I just sat down at lunch, and they kind of converged around me. We had fun during recess, and we occasionally played on the weekends. Dad refused to let me near any boys, though, so all of my friends were girls for a long while."

The twins nodded, inviting her to continue.

"There was Kasumi - she was the unofficial leader of the group; it was relatively deadly to give her pretzels; I guess that we were close. Then there was Tamami - she was the mother hen type, with a sweet tooth and a sense of humor. Akimi joined us a bit later on - around our second year of middle school - and her fiercest foe was her milk carton. Kaede had a passion for leaves and ferrets, and woe be to anyone who dared insult either of them within earshot of her. Hoshi was the actress of the group, but was very level-headed - except onstage, of course." Haruhi nodded, rolling her eyes before she continued her spiel. "Makimi had an almost alarming affinity with plants; her Venus fly trap, Spike, almost took Kasumi's finger off. Yaichi's got a long memory and is a bit of a tease."

The twins nodded, absorbed this information, and blinked quite a bit. After a long silence, Hikaru asked, as casually as possible, "Hey, Haruhi, what happened at the beach house - you know, in the time between we went off to interrogate Nekozawa and when we found milord blindfolding you?"

"Nothing special," Haruhi shrugged. "After I'd finished in the bathroom, I found out that I was in Kyoya-sempai's room; he was drying his hair from his shower. We had an odd little chat about merits when we were sitting on his bed. Then Kyoya-sempai stood up and Tamaki-sempai came into the room - he started imagining all this weird stuff, and questioned me furiously after Kyoya-sempai left the room, asking why Kyoya-sempai was shirtless, the lights were off, and the bed was messed up," at this point, she paused and glanced up at the two slack-jawed twins.

"Y-you and Kyoya-sempai had -!" Hikaru spluttered.

Haruhi sighed impatiently, "No, we did not. We were merely talking - funny, you had the same reaction as Tamaki-sempai. Anyway, after the interrogation, the storm started, and I retreated to the wardrobe. Tamaki-sempai seemed shocked at the fact that I always rode out storms that way, and warned me about the metal plates in the corners. After that, I jumped out, he spouted some weird, flowery line, and then he offered me the blindfold and earplugs so I couldn't see or hear the storm. Then you guys came in and the scene was mistaken yet again." She shrugged. "It was a relatively ordinary night."

The thirteenth question was Kaoru's to ask. "Which male host do you like the most, and why?"

Haruhi gave them her deadpan stare. "I am using one of my freebies on this question - as to why, if I said none of you, the two of you would make me pick one, and then pout if it wasn't you."

"Okay, then," Kaoru nodded. "That's fair enough."

Hikaru used the fourteenth question, rephrasing Kaoru's inquiry. "Which male host would you most like to know more about, and why?"

Haruhi considered her six options for a moment before answering, "I'd say either Mori-sempai or Kyoya-sempai. Mori-sempai is so quiet that you can never tell what he's thinking, and I'd like to see what goes on in that head of his and how his thought process operates. Kyoya-sempai, on the other hand, talks, but he only says what he wants us to hear - I'd like to see what's whirring away in his brain, and whether or not his heart is as black as many say."

The twins blinked at her; they had expected her to refuse to answer this question, as well, and that they could trap her by doing so. Instead, she had given them an answer that they themselves might have given, thereby telling them nothing useful.

"You may continue with your interrogation," Haruhi stated, leaning back in her chair.

"Right," Kaoru said, gathering himself more quickly than Hikaru, "for your fifteenth question: If you could be an animal, which would you be and why?"

Hikaru gaped at his twin, wondering why he asked such a pointless question.

Haruhi answered, "I'd probably be an owl. They're quite intelligent and have a rich history, in addition to being able to fly. Even though they're often associated with black magic, I get the feeing that they're on the side of justice; besides," she said with a slight shiver, "when they get cold, they can huddle together in their nests and fluff out their feathers to stay warm."

Kaoru, getting her hint, withdrew his arm from her shoulders and fetched a blanket. "Sorry, Haruhi," he apologized, tucking it around her - thereby dislodging his twin's arm, "I didn't realize how thin your Jasmine outfit is. You must've been cold."

Haruhi nodded once. "Thank you."

Hikaru watched this scene with some level of confusion before asking the sixteenth question, grinning in an eerily Kyoya-like manner. "If you had x-ray glasses and were trapped in a room with all of the hosts, where would you look?"

Kaoru blushed, recognizing the web page that his twin was paraphrasing. He shot his twin a warning look; they didn't want to scare Haruhi. Hikaru grinned guiltily, also blushing.

Haruhi, not blushing and obviously not grasping the point of the question, responded, "I'd probably look at the door, walls, ceiling, or floor to see if there was a way to get out."

Kaoru glowered at his twin and communicated, _That was a waste of a question._

_Like your animal one wasn't?_ Hikaru communicated back.

_Hey!_ Kaoru protested telepathically, _we found out that Haruhi respects owls and would like to be one - and that she was cold! You can't call that a waste of a question!_

Hikaru growled and looked away in defeat. _Fine, then._

"Seventeenth question!" Kaoru beamed, attempting to get the blush to vacate his cheeks. "If you had to eat chocolate," here he paused, and Haruhi blushed lightly, "out of one of our hands, who would you choose?"

"It depends on which type of chocolate each of you had," Haruhi whispered, well aware of what Kaoru was doing.

"Milk, always milk," Hikaru nodded.

"I have dark," Kaoru shrugged innocently, trying and failing to hide his smile.

"Then… Kaoru," Haruhi answered. "I prefer dark chocolate."

Hikaru looked away, displeased with this outcome. "Which of the two of us do you like more?"

Haruhi answered calmly, "I like you both the same amount; it's hard to compare you because you're so different."

The twins gaped at her, unable to form a coherent sentence.

Haruhi blinked up at them in apparent surprise. "You have no reason to look at me like that - it's not the first time I've commented on your differences."

"H-How do you tell us apart, anyway?" Hikaru asked weakly, using their nineteenth question.

"After I answer this question, I'm going to ask you two your three individual questions," Haruhi warned them. "I tell you apart by your ways of speech, the way you walk, and what hides in your eyes. I suppose that the last one is the tell-all; after all, they say that the eyes are the windows to the soul."

The twins blinked at each other, somewhat frightened. _She sees our souls?_

Haruhi laughed lightly before ordering Kaoru out of the room. "I'm doing Hikaru's questions first."

Kaoru walked quietly to the door and exited; he partially closed the door behind him and stood, listening.

"So, Hikaru," Haruhi smiled, "what's one thing that you and Kaoru will never, ever agree on?"

Hikaru gaped at her for a moment, some small portion of his brain thinking that he had done an awful lot of gaping today. He then answered, "I guess that we won't agree on whether milk chocolate is better than dark. I like milk; Kaoru likes dark."

"Second question," Haruhi nodded, "what is something that you want to happen, but you don't think ever will?"

Hikaru blinked at her, absorbing the many connotations of this question. "I don't know… maybe being independent from Kaoru and still being close to him…."

Haruhi gave a small, dangerous smile as she dropped the last question upon him. "Why do you like to touch me so much?"

"Um," Hikaru stalled, going rather red.

A slightly dangerous laugh escaped Haruhi's throat as she observed Hikaru's red-faced discomfort, amused at how splendidly he and his twin had corrupted her. She raised her eyebrows expectantly at Hikaru.

Hikaru, his entire face a lovely vermillion hue, stuttered, "I-it's because you're my - our - toy. Y-you have to touch your toys to - to play with them."

Haruhi nodded. "Alright. Tell Kaoru that he can come in, and you go out."

Hikaru beat a hasty retreat; Haruhi snuggled a little deeper into the blanket.

The twins exchanged a pleasantly - in Haruhi's mind, at least - horrified glance as they switched positions, Kaoru having heard every word of the interrogation.

"Hello, Haruhi," Kaoru said cautiously, reclaiming the seat on the arm of her chair.

Haruhi greeted him with an alarmingly cheerful smile. "Hello, Kaoru. Let's begin."

"If you insist," Kaoru gulped, noting how the roles had switched from the beginning of Haruhi's visit.

"I do," Haruhi smiled pleasantly. "So, Kaoru, what is one thing aside from chocolate that you and Hikaru disagree upon?"

"Well," Kaoru answered slowly, "if we both were ever to fall in love with the same person, I suppose that we'd argue over who got to court her."

Haruhi shook her head. "But then, you'd decide that Hikaru could have her, because you want him to be happy. But, Kaoru, answer me this - what if the girl was meant for you, and that she merely enjoyed Hikaru's presence - what then?"

Kaoru gaped at her. "I-I guess that I'd never know, because she'd be with Hikaru, and that it would all end well enough. I'd go on, support them, and find someone or something else."

"What if she told you that she preferred you, Kaoru - and the same night, Hikaru told you that he liked her - what would you do?"

"I don't know," Kaoru whispered, cheeks red. "I really don't know. Either way, someone would get hurt - if I protected Hikaru, she would get hurt, and if I accepted her, then Hikaru would get hurt. It'd be a no-win situation -"

"- that would work out in the end," Haruhi smiled softly. "Kaoru, I'm no expert on love, but if you really loved her, and she really loved you back, then I'm sure that Hikaru would step aside for you. Remember that - and go call him back inside the room. You guys have one more question to ask me."

Kaoru went to the door and found his twin staring at him blankly. After snapping his fingers in Hikaru's face, Kaoru began the discussion of what the last question should be. Eventually, after much arguing, the two of them came to an agreement and walked back to Haruhi, eager to hear her answer.

She smiled innocently at them from beneath her blanket, and nodded to show that she was ready for the final question.

"Haruhi," the twins said in unison, "if you could go back and do it over again, would you still open the door to music room three?"

Haruhi stood up, the blanket wrapped around her like a cape. Smiling slightly, she replied, "I am using my second freebie, so I do not have to answer that question."

The twins stared at her, disappointment flooding through them.

Haruhi, ignoring them and shifting back to her ordinary self, glanced at the clock on the mantle. "It's getting late - we should change into our pajamas." She began walking to the door; something occurred to her, and she turned around again. "By the way, I brought my own pajamas. I refuse to sleep in a princess outfit."

The twins numbly agreed and escorted her up to their bedroom, where they had had a maid take Haruhi's bag. Upon gathering her pajamas, Haruhi entered the twins' bathroom and locked the door behind her, so that she could change in peace and privacy.

And, although she would never admit it, her answer to their last question was 'yes.'

**Well, there's the end of the long-awaited 4****th**** chapter of PCLttU! I hope you enjoyed it and think it worth the wait. **

**I implore you to leave a review in that nice little review box. *bows deeply* Kindly make this poor excuse of a writer happy. **


	5. The Pajama-Clad Girl Talks in Her Sleep

**Claraowl: And now we have chapter 5! XD Hello again, all my lovely readers! I am greatly honored by your presence, as I own nothing but my sad excuse for a plot.**

**Warning: This chapter may or may not have fluffy parts and may or may not contain an OoC Haruhi (much like the previous chapter). ^^ Read at your own risk, and please refrain from telling Renge... unless, of course, you want her to write about this in her next doujinshi. In that case, feel free. :D**

Haruhi pulled her pajamas out of her bag and groaned. "Don't tell me… really? Again?"

"Are you alright in there, Haruhi?" the twins' voices called curiously from the other side of the bathroom door.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Haruhi sighed. "I'll be out in a few minutes." Muttering darkly, she changed her clothes and brushed her teeth. After packing her day clothes and toothbrush neatly back into her bag, she exited the bathroom and was immediately met by the blushing faces of Hikaru and Kaoru.

"H-Haruhi, d-do you usually -" Hikaru began, stuttering.

"- w-wear th-that to bed?" Kaoru completed, matching his twin.

"No," Haruhi growled. "Mei dropped by, presumably for a rice omelet, when I was packing my overnight bag. When I told her that I was going to a sleepover tonight - don't ask me why I told her, I have no desire to explain - she became extremely excited. She made this," she explained, plucking at her sleepwear, "for an upcoming fashion show at her high school, and wanted pre-show opinions. I refused, naturally - she must have swapped this for my regular pajamas when I was getting my toothbrush."

"W-well, it looks great," Kaoru said weakly, his cheeks a rather lovely shade of coral red.

Hikaru quickly sent Mei a text message saying that he and Kaoru approved of Haruhi's sleepwear. Moments later, Mei called and demanded to speak to Haruhi; Hikaru handed over his phone.

"Hello?" Haruhi greeted Mei warily.

"Why didn't you tell me that you were sleeping over at the twins' house?" Mei shrieked into the phone, sounding quite upset.

"You didn't ask," Haruhi replied calmly, holding the phone a few inches from her ear.

"I wouldn't have switched your pajamas if I'd known!" Mei groaned apologetically. "Are you going to be okay?"

"I don't see why not," Haruhi answered. "After all, it's just a camisole and some shorts. Besides, it's not like anything unusual is going to happen."

"Really?" Mei asked, sounding surprised. "Okay, then." She then switched into business mode. "Let me know how comfortable the set is to sleep in, if it gets tangled in the sheets, if the straps are too loose and fall, if the shorts ride up, or if there's another problem, okay?"

Haruhi quickly wrote all the different points down on a scrap of paper. "I'll try, but there are no guarantees."

"Why are you sleeping over at their house, anyway?" Mei asked, curious and slightly suspicious.

"It was a dare during Truth or Dare at the club this afternoon," Haruhi replied nonchalantly.

"Let me know if they do anything weird, okay?" Mei asked. "The front is kind of low, and it's an animal print…"

"Alright, but it'll probably be okay," Haruhi shrugged, rather unconcerned.

After a bit more questioning, Haruhi passed the phone back to Hikaru and Kaoru, as Mei wanted to hear their thoughts on the fashion aspect of the sleepwear. After gaining a rather hearty approval from both twins (and, to Mei's utter delight, the twins' mother, who happened to walk past the open bedroom door and glance inside), Mei said goodnight to them all and hung up.

Kaoru came up next to Haruhi and touched the bottom of her camisole. "It's so silky, yet not real silk… amazing, isn't it, Hikaru?"

Hikaru hugged Haruhi from behind, "Simply astonishing." He grinned widely at his view down her front, still blushing rather splendidly.

Kaoru's hand flitted to Haruhi's rather small, vividly pink shorts. "I like the fuzzy softness of these," he nodded. Blushing almost imperceptibly, he lay down in front of her and laid his head on her legs, pillow-style.

Haruhi, far too used to their antics for her own good, merely shrugged and said, "They are rather comfortable."

After a few moments of cuddling, Haruhi glanced over at the twins' digital clock; somehow, it had gotten to be half past midnight. She shrugged to herself, dislodging Hikaru in the process, and rationalized that the interrogation had taken quite a bit of time. She yawned, exhausted from the insanity that was her daily life with the host club.

Fifteen minutes after Haruhi had checked the clock, Kaoru pulled himself off of her lap. "Are you ready, Haruhi?"

"Ready for what?" Haruhi asked, feeling somewhat brain-dead.

"Bed," the twins chorused, "unless you had something else in mind."

Haruhi shook her head, stood up, and fetched her sleeping bag. The final proof of how tired she was made itself obvious when she was invited to sleep in their bed with them. To their surprise, she accepted - and then lay out her sleeping bag in the middle of the bed, under the sheets. Hikaru and Kaoru snickered slightly at this and crawled into bed on either side of her - Hikaru on her left, Kaoru on her right. Hikaru threw an arm over her waist; Kaoru slipped an arm under her neck, to be used as a pillow. Haruhi snuggled into the blankets and bid the two of them good night.

"Good night," Hikaru grinned, resting his head on her stomach.

"Sleep tight," Kaoru whispered into her ear, laying his head nest to hers.

"What if I have to sleep loose?" Haruhi murmured, already half-asleep.

The twins laughed, "By all means, feel free."

Haruhi gave no answer, as she had already drifted into dreamland. Not long after, Hikaru, lulled by the gentle rise and fall of her stomach, joined her.

Kaoru, smiling gently at the scene before him, shifted his arm slightly so that Haruhi would be more comfortable. In response, she turned her head towards him, leaving only a couple of inches between their faces. Her slight movement caused Hikaru to release her and roll over, facing away from them. Kaoru gulped, noting the fact that he was now the only one in contact with Haruhi; he felt slightly guilty for enjoying this knowledge.

He was jolted out of his thoughts by Haruhi murmuring in her sleep. At first, he could not tell what she was saying; however, her volume slowly increased, certain words becoming audible. "…why… you wearing Takashi's… hat…?"

Kaoru blinked. _Did she just refer to Mori-sempai by his first name?_

Hikaru rolled back towards them and took Haruhi's left hand in his right.

Haruhi twined their fingers together, still facing Kaoru. "…Kyoya, don't do that…" she let out a soft moan, causing Kaoru to blush. "…it…tickles…"

Kaoru, not wanting to listen to this any longer, whispered into her ear, "Would you like some dark chocolate, Haruhi?"

Haruhi, to his great surprise, rolled onto her side, still facing him, and snuggled into his chest. "…Kaoru… love…feed me?" Her fingers did not leave Hikaru's hand as she lifted her lips to Kaoru's neck. "…it's smeared all over…again…"

Kaoru's face was a violent shade of amaranth. _I-Is that her tongue? Or are those her lips?_ He gasped slightly as a small twinge of pain; his eyes widened slightly as he realized what Haruhi was doing.

"Kaoru…" Haruhi whispered in her sleep, her words dancing across his neck "…will you… embarrassed if everyone sees…mark I made…?"

"N-No," Kaoru stuttered, not sure if she could still hear him, "n-not at all."

Hikaru's eyes fluttered open. "Kaoru, did you say something?" he muttered, sitting up.

"I was talking to Haruhi," Kaoru said, motioning to the girl with her lips on his neck.

Hikaru blinked at the scene before him, not fully awake. "What the…?"

"Well, she was dreaming about Kyoya-sempai, so I asked her something to divert her," Kaoru explained, "but then I think her dream switched to me."

"Or maybe I'd be a dragon…" Haruhi muttered almost imperceptibly, before returning her lips to Kaoru's neck.

Hikaru, half-asleep, decided not to fuss over this. "M'kay," he murmured, snuggling into Haruhi's back and flinging his free arm over her sleeping-bag-covered waist. "G'night." And he descended once more into sleep.

Kaoru sighed in relief as Haruhi continued her ministrations on his neck. Laughing slightly, he thought, _It's going to be interesting to explain these marks at the club. Milord is going to go absolutely bonkers._ He began snickering, bowing his chin into his chest. Haruhi shifted her ministrations from his neck to his cheek; in surprise, he turned to face her… the rest is fairly self-explanatory, and resulted in a happy and vermillion-faced Kaoru. Haruhi slipped her head back into the crook of his neck and settled down; with the scent of her hair wafting past his nose, Kaoru followed his toy and his twin to dreamland. He did not, however, drop off before he heard Haruhi's last whisper, an answer to the final question he and Hikaru had asked. This answer led him into his dream with a smile on his face.

Hikaru snuggled up against Haruhi's back, gripping her hand more tightly. In his dream, a fierce battle raged… one that he knew he could not win. He sighed sadly into her ear, causing her dream to change yet again….

In her dream, Haruhi laughed. It had been a long while since the twins had appeared together. The three of them were walking, hand in hand in hand in hand, along a rather peaceful forest trail. Suddenly, a split in the path came into view; it branched out in two directions, one path large enough for two people, the other made for one. Her eyes saddened as the conversation continued and the split approached; she had known that this day would come, but had not expected it to come so soon. _Please,_ she wished, _let this path continue just a little longer. I'm not ready to choose… I'm not ready to let go. _As if in answer to her plea, the split slid further away from the happy trio, out of sight. She sighed in relief and turned her attention back to the conversation, a smile on her face and a worry in her heart. The split would not stay away for long.

Kaoru's dream was slightly different than Hikaru's, but not by much. He, too, was in a fierce battle; however, his side was to have victory. _To the victor belong the spoils… but at what cost? _he wondered, looking at the tear-streaked face of his opponent. _But at what cost?_

Haruhi was awakened early the next morning by the sound of Hikaru's cell phone going off. Not thinking much of it, she picked it up and recognized the number. Flipping it open and sitting up, she yawned, "Good morning, Tamaki-sempai."

"Haruhi!" Tamaki's voice screeched over the phone, waking her up fully and nearly deafening her. "Are you all right? Did those twins do anything to you? Why did you answer Hikaru's cell phone? DID THEY -"

"Sempai!" Haruhi shout-whispered. "Calm down, I'm fine. I just woke up, so will you please be quieter?"

"I'm sorry, Haruhi!" Tamaki exclaimed, but in a much lower decibel than he had previously used. "What did they make you do?"

"Not much," Haruhi replied. "We played a game, had dinner, played twenty questions, and then went to bed. The next thing I knew, Hikaru's phone was waking me up. End of story."

"Oh," Tamaki replied, much relieved. "Okay then. I'll see you at school on Monday, then."

After they had said their goodbyes, Haruhi shut Hikaru's phone and put it back on the bedside table. She then dropped her eyes to the twins, who were slumbering on either side of her. A light bulb went off over her head as she lay back down between them. Carefully, she stuck her index fingers into their navels and closed her eyes, being careful to keep her breathing even and slow.

Moments later, Hikaru and Kaoru opened their eyes, fully awake. They looked at the supposedly sleeping Haruhi's fingers and laughed, wondering what insane dream of hers could have led to this.

Haruhi, still feigning slumber, slowly shifted her hand to their sides. Once they had arrived at their destinations, she allowed her eyes to snap open and an evil grin to cross her face; she began tickling them. The twins, surprised, were reduced to helpless laughter. Words were useless; it was all the two of them could do to attempt to tickle her back. As it transpired, Haruhi's back was not ticklish; Hikaru's hands skipped to her thighs and Kaoru's, to her neck. Haruhi shrieked with laughter and flung her head back, trapping Kaoru's hand. The tickling continued in this vein until the maids came in to tell them that breakfast was ready.

As Haruhi changed into the next day's clothes in the bathroom, Hikaru asked through the door, "What gives, Haruhi?"

"What do you mean?" Haruhi called back, pulling her shirt over her head.

"Dressing up, dancing with us, starting that crazy tuna game, and pretending to be asleep so you could tickle us… it's not like you, Haruhi," Kaoru replied.

"So what's going on?" Hikaru asked as Haruhi opened the door, shaking her hair into place.

Haruhi smiled and looped her arms through theirs. "I don't really know - maybe it's just how much the two of you have corrupted me. Shall we go down to breakfast?"

Hikaru and Kaoru grinned back at her, relishing the fact that she was being so free with them. "We shall."

Breakfast was a rather eventful happening, not least due to the fact that their waffles had powdered sugar on them. Needless to say, Hikaru and Kaoru used every excuse they could think of to remove the powdered sugar from Haruhi's face - with their tongues, of course.

Haruhi rolled her eyes and calmly took another bite of waffle. "Tamaki-sempai called this morning," she said conversationally.

"Really?" Hikaru asked.

"What did milord have to say?" Kaoru inquired.

"Oh, he was just freaking out, wondering what 'those twins' did to me yesterday," Haruhi shrugged. "The usual."

The twins grinned. "And what did you tell him?"

"Just that we played some games, had dinner, and went to bed. He seemed to accept that," Haruhi answered, taking another bite of her waffle. "By the way, Kaoru, what happened to your neck?"

Kaoru's hand flew to the side of his neck and he blushed slightly, grinning. "Funny that you should ask, Haruhi - after all, you're the one who gave this to me."

Haruhi stared blankly at him for a moment while Hikaru did a rather impressive jaw drop. She then hit her fist into her palm and asked, "When I was asleep, right?"

"Right in one," Kaoru beamed. "Open wide for your reward!"

Rolling her eyes, Haruhi allowed herself to be fed a square of waffle.

Hikaru then disrupted this scene by upending the syrup container - pouring the contents all over Haruhi's shirt, of course. He was rewarded by her famous half-oval stare as she attempted to remove the sticky liquid from her clothing. Eventually, sighing heavily, she went upstairs to change into yesterday's shirt and rinse out her maple-covered one.

Kaoru glared at his twin as they sat at the counter, waiting for her to come back. "Why?"

"Why what?" Hikaru asked, completely innocent. "It was an accident. There are no why's about it."

Kaoru sighed heavily, and then grinned widely, reaching for the syrup container. What was left of the syrup was soon making its way down Hikaru's face. Hikaru retaliated by dumping the powdered sugar over Kaoru's head. Kaoru then shook his head, sending clouds of powdered sugar flying off of him; the sugar naturally stuck to Hikaru, syrupy as he was. Hikaru then hugged his twin, getting Kaoru sticky and himself even more covered in powdered sugar. This fierce battle went on for quite some time, and was the scene that met Haruhi when she reentered the room. A smirk spread across her face as she grabbed their camera off of the nearby table and began snapping picture after picture. She was careful to put the camera back before they surfaced from their breakfast condiments war, of course - after all, she didn't need the two of them forcing her into any more outfits for revenge.

At the end of the war, the three friends settled down and ate what was left of the waffles in relative peace - until, at least, Kaoru asked what seemed to be a simple question. "Did you dream anything last night, Haruhi?" He glanced sideways at her, licking powdered sugar off of the tip of his thumb as he did. Hikaru, interested, turned to look at Haruhi, whose face had turned a rather fetching shade of brick red.

"A bit," she shrugged, putting a rather large bit of waffle into her mouth and not meeting either of their stares.

"Did you dream, perchance," Kaoru paused dramatically, "about chocolate?"

At this point, Haruhi's eyes widened, she inhaled incorrectly, and she began to choke. After much coughing, some thumping on her back, and half a glass of water, she was able to breathe again. "W-what?" she coughed, staring at Kaoru in horror.

"You talk in your sleep, did you know that?" Kaoru beamed brightly.

"No fair, Haruhi!" Hikaru pouted, drawing her attention onto himself. "You didn't talk while I was awake!"

"Actually," Kaoru interjected, "she did, but it was during the point that you woke up again briefly before falling back asleep."

"Oh," said Hikaru faintly, before returning his gaze to Haruhi.

"And what did I say?" Haruhi asked, almost afraid to hear the answer.

"Oh, it was mostly disjointed stuff," Kaoru answered carefully. "You know, stuff like 'hat' and 'that tickles,' 'smeared' and 'mark' - but then you said something about dragons, and answered a question." He raised his eyebrows slightly and smiled innocently at her. "You gave me this," he brushed his fingers lightly across the mark on his neck again, "after you started muttering about chocolate. What exactly were you dreaming, Ha-ru-hi?"

Haruhi glanced at the clock and stood up, ignoring his question. "I've got to get going," she informed them, face still red, "or Dad will worry about me."

The twins, surprisingly, let this go, and escorted her to their limo. After a relatively uneventful ride, the twins bade her good bye and said that they would see her on Monday. Smiling at them, she waved her farewell and was shortly thereafter severely hugged by her overly worried father. Snickering, the twins watched until their toy and her father had gone inside.

On the ride home, the still-sticky twins grinned at each other. It had been the best night's sleep they'd had in a long time.

**Claraowl: Aaand that wraps up this chapter! You lot have Ebru Raveniz Gunduz Lestrange to thank for the relatively quick update (even if you think it slow… gomen'nasai), due to her threatening me with the prickly fruit. ^^**

**Kindly leave me a review and let me know if you liked it! :D There should be one more chapter to wrap everything up.**


	6. Epilouge: Who Knows the Princess Best?

**Claraowl: Hello, y'all! XD I am here to humbly present to you the sixth and FINAL chapter of PCLttU! Please save all fangirling, sobs, or sighs of relief for your review (that I beg you to leave for me). ^^ I own nothing of this except my very, very poor plot and some delicious chocolate. *smirks***

**Thank you to everyone who has left reviews, threatened me with prickly fruit to get my lazy writing fingers in gear, offered ideas, and given me encouragement. *beams* You guys are the best!**

"You have got to be kidding me," Haruhi stated in flat disbelief, staring at the other members of the host club about a week and a half after the sleepover incident.

"Oh, but we aren't, Haruhi," Kyoya smiled, a rather ominous aura surrounding him. "We decided to do this event due to popular demand; the ladies requested unanimously that you be the one to wear this outfit." He adjusted his glasses. "It does make sense, after all - you are the only girl in the club."

Haruhi protested, "They don't know that. Wouldn't the risk of my secret being discovered outweigh the benefits of accepting their request?"

"Normally, yes," Kyoya replied coolly, "but in this case we can merely say that you're wearing padding in that particular area." When Haruhi opened her mouth to protest again, Kyoya added, "We'll also double the amount of debt removed today if you wear the costume without any more complaints."

"Fine," Haruhi huffed, taking her costume and heading to the changing room.

While Tamaki was busy complaining that "Mommy" was being mean to "his little girl," Kaoru and Hikaru were silently stewing. They were happy to see her in the outfit, yes; however, they did not want to share the sight with anyone else. It was in this half-seething, half-excited mood that the opening of the club hours found them.

Naturally, the response of the ladies to the accepted cosplay request was overwhelming; Haruhi wondered, in some small portion of her mind, if she was going to go deaf from all the squealing. She sighed, supposing that this was to be expected - after all (at least according to Renge), cross-dressing was extremely popular when done by young men. _What they would say if they figured out I'm not actually cross-dressing today?_ she wondered, gazing around at the various squealing guests and ignoring her one squealing sempai.

"You make a wonderful Jasmine, Haruhi!" Momoka squealed enthusiastically. "Your outfit is from when Jafar was in power, right?"

"Yes, it is," Haruhi smiled. "In my opinion, it's one of the best scenes in the movie."

Kazue giggled, "You look even better in cross-dress than in your regular clothes!"

"Thanks, I think," Haruhi smiled, leaning forward to get some coffee for her customers.

"Haruhi," Momoka giggled, "if you don't mind my asking… what went into your costume?"

"I'm not entirely sure, to tell you the truth," Haruhi shrugged, flashing them her signature smile as she poured the coffee.. "I'm not terribly involved in costume assembly; I usually just play along with the rest of the hosts. As far as I can tell, it's just an ordinary costume."

"What about on top?" Renge asked, having heard the conversation as she was walking past and deciding that she needed to participate.

"What do you mean?" Haruhi asked, tilting her head to the side.

"You know," Renge grinned, moving her rib cage from side to side, "on _top_."

Haruhi blinked blankly at Renge for a moment before comprehending what she was talking about and blushing very lightly. "Just what you'd normally find in a costume," she shrugged. "Nothing terribly unusual."

"Really?" Renge asked, blushing slightly, "Then how are you holding it up?"

Before Haruhi could figure out a safe answer to her question, Hikaru and Kaoru - dressed identically as the Genie - swooped over and burst into song. Their rendition of "Friend Like Me" went on for quite a while and successfully distracted the ladies.

After they had ended with a rather long note and the subsequent clapping had died down, Haruhi smiled and said, "That was rather impressive, but shouldn't you be singing that to Aladdin?" She pointed calmly across the room to Tamaki, who was clad in Aladdin's 'street rat' costume. Mori, as Abu, and Hunny, as the flying carpet, were entertaining with him. Haruhi blushed lightly, her eyes flickering to the top of Mori's head before she turned back to the ladies she was entertaining. "Where were we?"

"We were talking about all the lovely costumes," Momoka smiled. "We're so glad that you accepted our request to pay Jasmine."

Haruhi smiled, yearning to say that it hadn't been her decision at all.

"Jasmine," a voice called from halfway across the room, effectively halting their conversation, "come to your master."

Haruhi stood up and excused herself from her guests, walking over to where Kyoya sat upon a long sofa, sultan-style. "You are far from being my master, Jafar."

"Jafar-_sama_," Kyoya corrected, smirking icily. "Kneel next to me, or I shall have to force you to do so."

Haruhi simply glared at him, and continued to do so until he raised his scepter; she then knelt jerkily, as if being forced to do so.

"I desire some grapes," Kyoya smirked again. He paused slightly, to ensure that the entirety of the guests' attention was on the scene, and then continued, "Kindly take some from that bowl and feed them to me." His smirk grew slightly wider as Haruhi glowered at him and the squeals of the onlookers grew to a new pitch.

Haruhi, glowering at Kyoya, slowly got up fetched the grapes; as she did so, a smirk of her own slowly grew upon her face. She walked back towards him, almost slinking, a cluster of grapes held in one hand. Kneeling down next to him again, she swayed herself slightly from side to side.

Kyoya raised his eyebrows slightly as he gulped imperceptibly, Haruhi's breath now skating over his neck.

Haruhi smirked, leaning over Kyoya to feed him a grape, and said in a low voice that nonetheless carried through the entire room, "Is that a lamp in your pocket, Jafar-sama, or are you just happy to see me?"

Three seconds of stunned silence followed this not-so-innocent question - mainly consisting of nearly everyone in music room three wondering if they had heard Haruhi properly - before the squeals, shrieks, and general mayhem burst forth. Tamaki, naturally, had a rather amusing conniption that concluded with him growing mushrooms in a corner. Kyoya, however, said nothing, and merely chewed his grapes, blushing rather lightly.

During the chaos, Hikaru and Kaoru walked over to Haruhi, took her hands in theirs, and led her off to a couch on the far side of the room. Hikaru was snickering to the point of being rendered incapable of speech, so Kaoru asked, "Did you ask the Demon Lord what we believe you asked him?"

Haruhi smiled innocently before replying, "Well, I couldn't just go along with being Jasmine without getting some form of revenge, could I?"

Hikaru had to grip Kaoru's shoulder in order to remain standing, due to the intensity of his laughter. Kaoru snickered appreciatively and pulled something out of his pocket, casting her an inquiring look.

Haruhi raised her eyebrows. "What? Did you truly expect the corrupted me to let this slide?"

"Nope," Kaoru grinned. "Good work." He held out a square of bitter-dark chocolate, allowing it to touch her lips.

She smiled back at him before poking her tongue out of her mouth and licking the edge of the square.

Hikaru regained control of himself and pulled out his own square of sweet-dark chocolate, putting it next to Kaoru's square.

Haruhi laughed lightly as she flicked her tongue back and forth a few times, before she took a bite out of each of the squares. She chewed the chocolate and then returned to her guests, who were still in the throes of moe.

Hikaru and Kaoru watched her go; when she disappeared into the swarm of fangirls, they looked down at the bits of chocolate left in their hands. A puzzled expression flitted over each of their faces as they shifted the remnants of the squares so that the pointed edges connected. The two of them blushed and grinned when they saw that - either by happy accident or careful design - the bites Haruhi had taken out of the squares, when put together, formed a heart. The two of them stood in that position, essentially rooted to the spot, for the rest of the club time. It was only when the guests had left and the chocolate had begun to melt that they moved and ate their chocolate, blushing happily.

Tamaki, suspicious of their stillness and silence, walked over to them. "What's up with the two of you?"

Hikaru and Kaoru glanced at Tamaki and then met each other's eyes. Identical evil grins spread across their faces. "Do you want to play a game with us, milord?"

Tamaki, slightly startled, asked, "What type of game?"

"A game," Hikaru grinned, "to see if you know Haruhi as well as we do!"

"Of course I know her as well as you two do! I'm her father, after all," Tamaki laughed.

"Oh, really?" Hikaru sneered. "Do you, now?"

"I guess that he doesn't want a chance to see the pictures, Hikaru," Kaoru sighed. "His loss… had he won the game, he could've seen Haruhi in another princess outfit!"

Tamaki's jaw dropped. "Wait, what?" he shrieked, eyes bugging. "I'll play, I'll play!"

"Don't do it, sempai," Haruhi warned from within the changing room. "It's a trap."

"Nonsense!" Tamaki exclaimed, brandishing his arms. "I am prepared - Haruhi, come ask questions!"

"Fine," Haruhi groaned, emerging from the changing room, "but Hikaru and Kaoru have to play separately - no teamwork."

Hikaru and Kaoru shrugged, seeing no reason to argue; after all, they had both been present for the interrogation. Tamaki nodded enthusiastically.

"Write down your answers on a sheet of paper, so no one can quibble over who said what first," Haruhi instructed. She paused, allowing them to gather the necessary materials. "Ready? There will be three questions."

The three hosts before her nodded happily; the other three members of the club lent an ear to the proceedings.

"Question one - why do I find it interesting that Mori-sempai is playing Abu?" Haruhi asked, smiling slightly.

Tamaki gaped at her for a moment, before writing something down; both Hikaru and Kaoru glanced at Mori before writing their answers.

"Question two," Haruhi announced, casting her eyes upward as she thought, "what are my two favorite animals?"

Tamaki grinned as he scribbled something that looked suspiciously like 'tanuki' upon his paper; Hikaru did the same, and added another one; Kaoru, smiling slightly, calmly wrote out his answer.

"Question three," Haruhi smiled, looking at the three of them, "what is one thing that I find myself completely helpless against when offered?"

The three answers were written down quickly upon the paper; Haruhi then collected the sheets and picked up a pen. "I'll let you know your scores in a few minutes," she informed them, walking over to a table, their intense stares following her,

Haruhi smiled slightly as she read their answers, making marks here and there; silently, she chided herself for tilting her questions. When was done, she stood up and walked over to the three of them. She quietly handed them their papers.

Waves crashed over Tamaki's mind. He hadn't gotten a single one correct.

Hikaru shrugged; he had gotten one and a half of them correct, as he'd only known one of the animals. He glanced over at his twin, and felt his jaw drop when he saw the results.

Kaoru had gotten all three questions correct: for the first one, he had put that she often dreamt of Mori-sempai wearing a hat, and Abu's costume had a hat; for the second, he had put the owl and the dragon as her favorite animals; for the third, he had put chocolate - exceptionally dark chocolate.

Haruhi shrugged at the three of them before turning to leave; she was stopped by Kaoru, who had put a hand on her arm. Standing up, he whispered an inquiry into her ear; Haruhi smiled mysteriously before going over to ask Kyoya about her debt level. Fortunately for her, the chaos caused by her line had brought in enough business to compensate for his slight irritation at her, so she was not penalized for her revenge.

"Don't feel bad, milord," Hikaru snickered. "It's not your fault that you weren't at the interrogation -"

"- or there to hear her talk in her sleep," Kaoru completed, grinning widely.

"T-talk in her sleep?" Tamaki squeaked. "Y-You - you three -"

"Yup, all three of us fit on the bed," Hikaru beamed.

"Best night I've had in a long time," Kaoru added.

Tamaki's eyes bugged out. "MOMMY! Hikaru and Kaoru slept with their sister! They spoiled - deflowered - ruined - they - do something!"

Kyoya wisely ignored this outburst; Hunny happily ate cake; Mori-sempai was, at the moment, learning why Haruhi found it interesting that he was playing Abu - and, upon discovering that he had appeared in her dreams, found himself feeling rather flattered. Naturally, no emotion was displayed upon his face. Tamaki let out a soft sort of moan as he retreated, muttering, to his corner; he then proceeded to grow enough mushrooms to feed Italy for a month. Hikaru and Kaoru raised their eyebrows at each other, realizing what Haruhi had done with the questions.

Haruhi gave a small laugh as the twins caught up to her in the hallway outside the music room. "Figured it out, have you?"

The twins grinned at her and, leaning down, each gave her a kiss on the cheek. Haruhi smiled at them, blushing lightly, as she returned the favor. She then walked away, leaving two shocked Hitachiins standing in the hallway, chocolate lip prints on their cheeks.

**THE END! **

**I hope you liked it, and found it a satisfactory wrap-up to this story. :D**

**I hope that everyone had as much fun reading this as I did writing it! XD**

**Kindly drop a review in the lovely little review box, even if it is just to yell at me for a poor wrap-up or for the fact that it's over (or is that too hopeful of me…?).**


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